Being a GOOD PERSON (VII)



BEING A GOOD PERSON (VII)


How ‘human progression’ steals, kills, and destroys the produce of healthy, Holy fruit


Being a GOOD PERSON – Part 7 – ‘On-demand’ culture neutralises patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and temperance…


Deception is riddled within every part of western society’s infrastructure – social, political, agricultural, financial, relational, psychological, and of course, spiritual.

Like a genie offering infinite wishes, technology makes the marketplace hyper-responsive to our desires; however, there’s a deceptive cost from these ‘Djinn,’ that amplifies selfish ambition–otherwise known as greed–and diminishes the human propensity toward selflessness.

It is the price we unwittingly pay for the convenience and ease that technology provides, but what I’ve observed is that this ‘tax’ directly afflicts the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

Through the over-reliance on technology, the covert ‘toll’ stolen from our soul, transforms us from agents of Truth into vessels of deception, living-out self-deceived lives, and deceiving others as well.

It’s an awful perpetual cycle, permitted by the collective consensus of society, and rooted in the broken, fallen nature of humanity, which is inclined toward self-preservation, self-exaltation, and self-gratification.

The desire toward self-preservation, self-exaltation, and self-gratification is enhanced and catalysed by technology with no sense of guilt or shame, because society on the whole has granted an invisible allowance toward the by-product behaviours.

These ‘permitted’ by-product behaviours range from the simplicity of minor fabrications when relating to people, saying “we’re fine” when actually we’re not, to the colossal construction of capitalism where sellers of products and services will often feign care for the health of their consumers, when their focus is monetary commission.


Telling lies while using technology comes as easy as drinking water. There is no need for justification or vindication in the mind as a person ‘fibs’ on social media.

Most of the time, everything is happening so quickly in online communication, that a person doesn’t have the opportunity to contemplate what they’re professing.

Other moments, there’s an over-thinking of one’s own dialogue, manifesting the self-affirmed, perfectly-manufactured answer, rather than the sincere, raw truth; a little exaggeration here, a slight embellishment there…”Everyone does it,” becomes the conscious and subconscious permission. Herd immunity is conceived, resisting the ‘wrong’ in lying.

“It’s completely acceptable to use photoshop to improve my images and different filters to enhance my physical features. I’m doing no harm.”

We already know that filters are a harmful lie, because these same social media influencers who’ve used them, have moved to the next superficial fashion, which unwittingly confesses the deception.

This fashionable hashtag of which I speak, utilises the exact opposite method of the filters, proving the collective perspective that this is a damaging lie.

The opposing hashtag is ‘no-filter,’ self-attributed by people revealing how unbelievably, naturally attractive they are, proving without a doubt that a large collective consider the filters a deception.


There are more deceptive behaviours that have become acceptable to the multitude.

The term ‘ghosting’—a decision a person makes to completely and utterly ignore a correspondence—has become a passing joke, when in fact it’s an extremely rude, cold, and selfish action founded in pride and fear.

Regardless, it’s very much permissible because of our society’s assimilation of technology’s ‘unwritten laws’ regarding communication – laws that if written down would probably include the first commandment:

“People can do whatever is right in his / her / their own eyes within sensible parameters as deemed reasonable by the individual.”


Human progression in the form of technology for home-delivery, has created an ‘On-Demand’ culture; the ability to receive anything–ranging from groceries to actual people–at the click of a button.

Amazon Prime, Amazon Prime Now where you can get things in two hours, TV box sets where they release all the episodes in one go, Just Eat, and Deliveroo are a few examples of the ‘On-Demand’ lifestyle we enjoy.

On the relationship side, Tinder is the app that allows us to literally know people at the swipe of our finger. I say ‘know’ in the Old Testament Biblical sense…

These are ongoing, daily examples happening in our society…in our world. Accepted. Addicted. Normal.

So how do these common scenarios of daily life afflict the cultivation of the Holy fruit patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and temperance?


Reminding ourselves of the meanings: patience–better translated “long-tempered”–is defined as a gritty, determined resolve that never gives up.

Kindness reflects an attitude that remains positive towards people, even when they don’t deserve it.

Goodness is a big-hearted generosity to others, both in word and deed.

Faith or faithfulness reflects a profound trust in God with a subsequent faithfulness to his will.

Gentleness is strength, authority, and power kept under control for the benefit of others.

Temperance/ self-control is yielding to the Holy Spirit and allowing him to take a “powerful grip” upon our whole life – surrender.

In many ways, these six components of the fruit of the Holy Spirit cross over. They’re intertwined.

In expression within relationships, one can’t be expressed without the others. In fact, this goes for all the attributes comprising the fruit of the Holy Spirit – this is likely because Godly exhibition of love encompasses all of the eight attributes mentioned in the Galatians 5 Scriptures.

I’m going to give some real-life, everyday examples of our overuse of technology in the form of social media and how it can impact these attributes of patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and temperance.

I leave it up to you dear reader as to whether these observations carry weight in my assertion that they’re rotting the Holy Spirit’s fruit.


Patience – the one that’s deeply undervalued


Impatience, which I believe is being catalysed by ‘on-demand’ culture and social media lifestyle, uncovers some unpleasant aspects of the human soul.

Like pulling back the duvet on a bed that hasn’t been washed for months, we are seeing the human conscience in all its pain and reactivity to that hurt, through our technology age.

I’m sure that by now, most of us have witnessed an individual text something abruptly in a group chat and then delete it.

The ability to delete messages on social media has revealed how uncertain and impatient we are.

The individual expresses their true heart quite clearly like a drunk on Saturday night. They then delete the message.

We’re not talking about an error in punctuation, spelling, or grammar here. We’re speaking of an error in how they wished to be represented.

They may have said something too brash or words that they perceived to be ignorant.

While the ability to delete messages caters to our sense of convenience, ease, and self-defined perfection, patience as a natural ability subtly leaves us. But we need patience and I will show you why.

We—as believers in Christ—are called to follow Him and by submitting to Him, we embrace His Truth. The one and only Truth. No mixing, blending, or compromising.

Part of the ability to walk in Truth comes with the fruit of patience.

We need patience to walk in faith. Faith is required for belief in God’s Truth; a God who’s invisible and so requires our trust that despite not seeing Him, He is there, and everything He says is real.

As said before, Forbearance/Patience is better translated “long-tempered”. The word really means a gritty, determined resolve that never gives up. It’s the endurance and perseverance spoken of in the book of James and is built out of being tested through challenging times.

It’s one of the more obscure attributes of a Spirit-led life. It’s not seen as conspicuously as kindness, because in many ways, patience cannot be measured like kindness can.

But patience is an all-important, concealed attribute that binds healthy communication and relationship.

It’s what allows husbands and wives to continue to choose to love one another despite the irritations and weaknesses that each may possess.

It’s what allows parents to keep choosing grace for their children, amid disobedience and rebellion.

It’s what allows friends to remain as such, regardless of having completely different points of view.

Additionally, a big part of being able to discern and resist deception is found in the ability to be patient.

Subsequently, there are several behaviours and abilities within patience that I see impacted or stolen through technology’s delivery of convenience and ease.


1. No longer having an ability to be patient in relationships with people on all levels – family, work, social etc.

2. A higher propensity toward distraction – unable to remain focused on goals and tasks

3. An anti-social disposition, even when surrounded by people – engaged with the phone rather than talking to others

4. Terrible memory – unable to retain simple things short-term and long-term due to the bombardment of information and messages from smart phones

5. Natural navigation skills – not able to use spatial awareness or navigate across great distances


This final point is more or less obsolete.

No one cares about being able to walk from one point to another without a map. I only mention it because it falls under the category of patience and is a skill that’s rendered redundant by Google maps and Sat Navigation.

The loss of these skills and transformation of our behaviour, is a result of instant gratification becoming both habitual and ritual, which is what social media and ‘On-Demand’ culture provide us.

This is a very simple equation, though I’m sure they’ll be people who dispute this:

Habits are built into us via repetitive action and/or thought. The human condition receives ‘On-Demand’ culture and simply grows used to it. Once it’s habitual, anything that requires patience becomes an irritation.

Now apply this model to relationships.

One doesn’t have to read deep psychology or philosophy to see how On-Demand will steal the ability to be patient with someone who requires that extra time.

How can a person be expected to maintain patience with their spouse, their children, or their working relationships when every part of their life has become habitual toward ‘instant reward?’


These are the hard facts of technology in conjunction with our inherent human ways. Social media steals our ability to relate to others, to talk on the phone, and to have face-to-face meaningful conversation. The essence of real communication gets lost with every technological advancement.

Then there’s the elimination of patience when ordering food online. I know the blissful feeling of receiving a takeaway meal. We barely have to move and before we know it, a delicious, deep-pan, stuffed-crust, pepperoni pizza deluxe is at our door, piping hot with a delicious smell, ready for consumption. Just writing this is tempting me…

Also, I can only imagine what this same model of On-Demand instant-gratification is like when applied to sexual desires. To swipe right and be able to have a sexual partner at your doorstep within minutes, willing to do anything you wish…

I never experienced this in my life, but I’ve heard stories from acquaintances; men talking about women who are willing to do anything; women talking about how they’ve sampled men from different countries all over the world. Men saying how it’s so easy now; women talking about how it’s a great self-esteem boosting exercise…

Essentially, who needs patience anymore?

It’s been relegated to the phantom zone. But then comes the real world; work-life or if one so chooses, family-life. These areas need patience if it’s to be a joyful, peaceful, productive relationship.

Patience is a necessary part of wholesome communication, thriving companionship, and healthy work-collaboration.

Whether an employer or employee, parent or child, husband or wife, patience is a significant virtue in co-habitation and cooperation.


Kindness – the one that’s easy to emulate


If we see Kindness as reflecting an attitude that remains positive towards people, even when they don’t deserve it, sadly, there is a great deal of damage that can be done to the fruit of kindness by our technological age of communication.

Communication–in its myriad of formats–is the cohesive gel that bonds individuals. It can help cultivate this positive attitude of kindness and therefore, if it’s in any way tainted through an alteration on its original design, there will be consequences both small and far-reaching in each person’s psyche.

The original design of communication is the use of all five senses while interacting with someone; (taste and smell are linked just in case you might be wondering how we can taste another individual without being more intimate with them).

When these senses are hindered or not engaged, the whole message relayed from one human vessel to another can’t be fully grasped. Things will be missed, but worse than this–with technology–things will be added.

Have you ever typed “lol” when you weren’t laughing out loud?

Have you ever used happy emojis when your emotions didn’t match the image?

What ends up being lost in the regular use of communication mediums like social media, is sincerity.

The fruit of kindness requires sincerity.

The above might seem like trivial details, but across months and years of this tech-driven communication, the meaning in our language becomes lost.  

How can one possibly possess a disposition of kindness–that of a person who has a positive attitude to others–when there is no sincerity or integrity?


Here is another real-life example I’ve observed.

I have a close friend who believes in the answers one can find in philosophical thought and critical theory.

We used to discover that when we had conversations via messaging on Facebook, we found very little agreement.

But when we spoke on video conferencing or face-to-face, we were able to enjoy a similar expression of our worldviews.

Our perspectives hadn’t changed; he was in support of a moral absurdist stance, believing people can create solutions to steer humanity in the right direction. I was and am for the objective Truth of Christ, remaining steadfast in the belief that following Jesus is the answer to all the problems in this world.

So why is it that we find such common ground during a video conference or face-to-face?

When we discussed it, I said to my absurdist friend that some abstract part of human relationships is lost in translation when texting or using messenger forums.

Now, take this same model and place it on other mediums; think of what we hear on the News and the images we see.

When faced with genocide or other horrific tragedies on the News, hearing and seeing it through an electronic medium negates a great deal of the emotional connection for us.

Imagine being physically present in these situations; being next to the suffering families or actually witnessing the nightmare itself.

It changes everything in our response to the scenario and provokes the hereditary compassion of our soul. But technology can easily be argued as a medium that desensitises us, stripping back an important attribute of the human condition – empathy.

Empathy–like sincerity–is needed in the fruitful component of kindness.

I hope you’re able to see how dangerous these daily motions and activities with technology really are, as we move onto our next part of the Holy Spirit fruit – goodness.


Goodness – the one so many believe they have


Goodness–a big-hearted generosity to others, both in word and deed–is something that the average person believes they have.

I confidently make this assertion because during street outreach, the common response of passers-by to questions about sin is: “I’m a good person.”

To illuminate how goodness can be chipped away by technology’s adaptation of relationship, I’m going to give another daily example of an online communication behaviour that’s generally accepted as normal.

Now this example is not to condemn anyone as I believe many will fall into this category, but it’s to illuminate a regular conduct that can have detrimental consequences to the ‘perpetrator’ and the recipient.

On several occasions, I’ve introduced friends to WhatsApp groups for particular initiatives.

“I’d like to welcome Mr. X to the group,” I’ve said.

Giving the standard introduction that we would if we were doing the same action face-to-face, the individual I’ve welcomed has then followed the message with:

“Hi everyone.”

What’s followed has embarrassed me at times, especially when I’ve told the individual: “they’re a warm and welcoming team.”

There’s been no response.

No acknowledgment whatsoever of the new group member.

Now, I’m not accusing any one individual of anything in this recurring observation.

It could’ve been that the 18 other members of the Whatsapp group didn’t see the message, because of the mysterious “busyness” that has dominated Western society in the last 15 years…

It could’ve been that they saw the message, but their particular code of technological communication meant they don’t respond to general messages, and only reply to personal correspondence.

It could’ve been that they simply didn’t want to respond.

Whatever the reason, I’m merely pointing out the challenge that technology brings when communicating.

Something gets lost here. Something gets missed.

In a real-life setting, a group would warmly welcome the individual. If they didn’t, it could be reasonably assumed that their social or hospitality skills were severely lacking,

Similarly, I’ve experienced occasions when I’ve been invited into WhatsApp prayer groups with Christians – supposedly the ambassadors of God’s love.

The introduction has been given to which I’ve thanked my introducer, but then what follows is the mental image of tumbleweed in a Wild-West deserted town.

There’s no acknowledgment.

As I write this, the particular example in my mind had a group of 27 members.

If I’d entered a room, been introduced, and no one had replied, I’d feel shocked and rejected.

I repeat, I’m not accusing anyone here of any ill behaviour. We each have our standards and convictions. But one can clearly see the lack of goodness that can emerge if technological communication replaces our ways of cultivating wholesome, loving relationships.


Faithfulness – the one ‘the world’ doesn’t need


We know what faith is. We are given a very direct description of it in Hebrews:


Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. This is what the ancients were commended for.

Hebrews 11:1 – 2

We also know that Faith or faithfulness as a natural product of the Holy Spirit, reflects a profound trust in God with a subsequent faithfulness to his will.

So, I only have a rhetorical question, intended to provoke your thoughts on how this particular attribute of the Holy Spirit fruit is afflicted by technology:

How can we live-out trust and hope in an invisible God (faith), if all the visible things we desire keep distracting us?

We must remember, distraction has never been as fierce as it is today with technology in our pockets, functioning like an additional bodily organ, and granting us our every wish ‘on demand.’

Smart phones are an ‘idol,’ fiercely competing with God for our attention, and largely winning.

How can we live out a profound trust of God and subsequent faithfulness to His will with so many tangible, worldly, ‘fulfilled’ desires?

Yes, I said “fulfilled desires.”

It’s difficult enough being distracted from God by unmet, healthy desires for a Christ-centred family or a wholesome career, but these are tangible desires that are being met in full all the time at the click or press of a button.

Often, what we think we want isn’t the healthiest option for us and yet with phone technology, we really can get everything we want instantly.

How is one able to tell if they really have faith in God with so much physical reward from their phone?

I feel as though I don’t need to say anymore here under the attribute of faith other than this closing verse:


What will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?

Matthew 16:26

Gentleness – the one that’s getting lost


I just need to mention one word for this section.

The word has been used to group a set of individuals who write spiteful responses to just about any cause.

These people are revealing of the sheer misuse of authority and the darkness of the human heart. I am of course talking about trolls.

Not to delve to deeply into psychology, but these are people who are clearly hurting and have chosen the remedy of sharing their pain with others through bullying and cruelty.

If gentleness is strength, authority, and power kept under control for the benefit of others, think about the authority and power given to people in chat rooms and comment sections.

Contemplate its misuse.

Ponder how each person’s words have such power to the point that people are being ‘helped’ in their sorrow to fulfil depression’s ultimate finale – suicide.

With gentleness, I don’t believe there is an eroding of this attribute so much as there is a catalysing of the opposite – cruelty.

Online communication opens a direct conduit to the selfishness and wickedness of the human condition.

The screen–whether computer or phone–provides a portal to the darkest part of our souls, ushering in abusive words that the average person would perceive as abundantly malicious.

Trolls take time to craft the perfect abuse, utilising grammar, punctuation, uppercase, and other planned means to mentally stab others in their hearts.

This behaviour is so prevalent, I don’t believe I need further examples to show how the gentleness portion of the Holy Spirit fruit is obstructed.


Temperance – the one that’s ridiculed


It’s important that we reiterate what temperance is.

So often, the translation used in the Scriptures is ‘self-control’ as though the human vessel has a part to play in managing their actions with this fruit.

There is indeed a part to play, but it isn’t restraining oneself as many often think. It’s not abstinence either, which would involve human strength of mind.

Temperance is yielding to the Holy Spirit and allowing Him to take a “powerful grip” upon our whole life.

It’s is surrendering and saying: “I can’t do it, help me,” rather than the traditional, human-strength approach: “I can overcome by controlling myself.”

There is an obvious, crude tempter that technology’s rise has permitted to run rife: Pornography.

Just so I don’t sound like a hypocrite, I confess that I used to indulge in pornography and had my last ‘self-gratification session’ in Mid-June 2016.

By God’s grace, I have not indulged in pornography or its accompanying act for over 5 years, but I truly mean it when I say it’s a miracle of God’s doing.

This confession might sound shocking to those ignorant of the plight. It may be surprising that I’m confessing such behaviour so openly, but I say it in recognition that temperance is a work of the Holy Spirit in us and nothing of our own mental resolve, bar our free-will choice to surrender to the Lord.

The question is, how can an individual cultivate temperance with the abundance of temptation readily available through technology?

In my worldly days, I recall hearing stories of men who during their lunch breaks at work would use the staff restrooms for a mini-session of self-gratification.

Some may turn their noses up at this statement, but this is the world we co-habit in all its realness.

Addictions to pornography are rife and the fruit of temperance doesn’t stand a chance unless the individual takes active steps of surrender to God, utilising an accountability fellowship that the Bible speaks of in verses like James 5:16 and Galatians 6:2.


Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

James 5:16

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Galatians 6:2

I sincerely know of no other way to live out temperance in our technological age than following God’s way of Kingdom fellowship, because we are saturated by temptation in all forms.

I mention pornography as the principle tempter, because it’s the one that most Christian brothers and sisters will keep secret, allowing the addiction to isolate them, and mount up internal guilt and shame.


Conclusion


As I said in my introduction, this is not about jumping to an extreme of abolishing technology from one’s life.

This is also not about the extremes of creating binary opposites that many people will try to fabricate in their minds in reaction to reading these observations.

Just like how people try to create the binary opposite of science VS religion, which is an individual attempting to comprehend the complicated concepts within each field through simplistic ‘grouping’ methodology, people will try suggesting that technology and faith are in opposition, or technology and spirituality are in contrast.

I’m NOT saying this, though the latter argument could very easily be formulated.

The problem with human progression in the form of technology and more specifically in our social, communication platforms, is the inclination behind its use.

The core reason for this use is ‘self-evolution’—a physical manifestation of independence, which by its very existence contradicts Kingdom life.

Technology allows us to feel like we can control everything and be completely self-sustaining; this is the opposite of Kingdom culture which calls on dependency of the divine Creator of all things.

Further, with the fruit of the Holy Spirit so heavily afflicted by technology’s impact, how can anyone hope to be Christ-like akin to living a healthy, holy life, glorifying God?

I did focus largely on social media in this article, but there are so many examples where technology is taking a silent and possibly deadly toll from our lives.

There are the newfound scooters in fashion, now stealing the mental and physical benefits of walking from us.

There are the dating apps–which I did mention–for the most part, attacking the sanctity of Kingdom ‘courting’ and marriage.

And there is consumerism–which I also mentioned–providing temporary relief only to see that material goods become the god over the individual.


This whole article was intended to bring awareness of a real problem; the abundance of time spent using technology.

From the beginning, I’ve made it as clear as possible that this is not a manifesto to encourage the destruction of technology. That would be gravely hypocritical and pointless to argue.

This thesis is merely to highlight some subtle and conspicuous issues that the common overuse of technology–namely smart phones and social media–play in hindering the production of Holy Spirit fruit.

But rather than closing on this difficult note, here are some potential steps to alleviate the ‘strongholds’ that modern conveniences have over us:

1. Much of the modern-day stress, anxiety, and sense of busyness emerges from our smart phones. I base this on repeated observations, documentaries, and my own experience. Perhaps a time of abstinence might be in order? It could be abstinence from social media or smart phones entirely. Guaranteed, it will grant you a new perspective on all the things technology is subtly doing to us as human beings.

2. Use communication through social media as though you were seeing that person. The tech companies intend for this kind of communication to replace our standard ways of interacting, so treat the chat forums as though you were seeing the person (or people) in front of you. Some might say they already do this, but really think about it. Do we leave people unacknowledged because we know we’re behind a screen? Do we always reply to people? Or do we allow for the convenience of being behind a screen to be lazy or completely ‘ghost’ someone? The latter behaviours aren’t natural to the human condition; we are adapting to technology with new, unnatural, anti-social behaviours – ironic.

3. Remember that social media provides dopamine hits. This means it can become an addiction and/or dependence very easily. This goes for all the apps whether dating, takeout, or ‘on-demand’ streaming, that provide massive libraries of films/TV. They over-indulge our fantasy and reward zones. Getting rid of my steaming sites like Netflix and Amazon Prime, I noticed that I appreciated movies a lot more. There isn’t the confusion one gets when choosing from the colossal, virtual warehouse of films and TV box collections. The films I watch are so much more enjoyable. Being able to be grateful for things like this is part of a healthy life. It can be difficult to be thankful when you are overfed or addicted.


Please remember, this is just a thesis.

I may develop it into a book someday with scientific data to support my claims, however, I don’t think scientific proof is necessary to digest the observations I’ve presented.

The produce of the Holy Spirit fruit is the mark of a true Christ-centred individual, but with the technological age we live in, the narrow road toward Jesus just got even more bombarded with ‘sideways energy.’


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