(27) Falling down
2010 – 2011. Age Twenty-Seven.
Have you seen the movie Falling Down 1993?
The sheer amount of humiliations, degradation, and painfully wrong decisions, were aspects of life I never thought I would see, experience, or be party to in my life.
In my mind, there were extreme situations I’d see on TV or read in books and I’d pridefully thought myself above these things.
Wrong!
Boy did I fall. And fall hard.
We’ve all heard the phrase, pride comes before a fall?
And I’m sure we’ve all heard the overused term of drink, drugs, and women?
My high flying moral code was shot to pieces with an AK -47 as I became more immersed in the hedonistic environs of the Caribbean.
The smallest part of me knew I was in hell or at least my own personal hell.
But what else was there?
I was in paradise, right?
This was as good as it gets, right?
This was a mantra that would keep me in the Caribbean for five years, stubbornly, ignorantly, naively trying to fashion an intimately personal hell-zone into my idea of heaven.
When I’d attempt to discuss the difficulties I was experiencing, I was met with a cold, sharp response:
“This is the school of hard knocks. If you don’t like it, leave bro. No one’s gonna care.”
Message from Jesus – “-”
Message from the World – “Don’t stop yet. You’ve only been here for two years. You can make it your paradise.”
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