(36) Leading from the Holy Spirit
2019 – 2020. Will be thirty-six by October, 2020.
Around November 2019, I received two very distinct messages from God.
The first told me to, “stop wrestling for a blessing.”
The second said, “build relationships one-on-one with people. Get to know people properly.”
I followed through with the healing journey I was on and had all my family home-videos converted into DVDs. I hadn’t watched these in over 20 years!
The videos brought a deep sadness over me as I realised I still mourned my parents’ divorce massively. But they also brought joy.
I don’t ignore that I still question whether Christianity is just another philosophy; a mindset to make one feel better where one believes and things come to pass through some form of existentialism.
But more and more I’m convinced and convicted that this truly is a relationship with the creator of the universe; this is mainly because of the ‘coincidences’ in life and the transformation my mind has undergone.
However, it’s fundamentally because of the Bible’s words.
As a piece of literature, the Bible alone is sufficient proof of Jesus’ resurrection–the core of Christian belief.
Amid its tone and very raw honesty, I read the Bible as I would any literature and see something supernaturally unique.
I say this in likes of comparison to Shakespeare, whose plays stand to me as the pinnacle of wisdom over the human condition.
The Bible goes further…
Its words know intimate details of the human makeup that only a creator or Father of our species could know.
Regardless of my questioning, my faith in Jesus continues to grow, because the transformation of my mind that I’ve experienced since becoming a Christian, is very distinct.
Concluding…
I don’t know what the future holds.
I wonder even more, now that I hear whispers of Corona threatening to change our way of life permanently.
I still dream to have a family of my own, and a writing career that provides enough to sustain me while being able to give generously. But at present, I will continue to take this life one day at a time as revealed to me by Jesus’ own words.
I have to say, those simple verses near the end of chapter six in the Gospel of Matthew changed my life. I share them with you below.
Part of what inspired me to reflect on 35 years of life was a question I saw about the previous decade 2010 – 2019.
I realised that my years could be split into two very distinct categories.
2010 – 2014 I lived by my own rules.
2015 – 2019, I surrendered to the One who died for our sins.
I never ever thought I’d be a Christian, but here I am.
I believe everyone should study the Word for themselves to understand as much of the meaning as humanly possible.
Hopefully–like me–you will learn that forging a relationship with Jesus opens you up to the stark truth of life.
It may hurt, but at least it’s THE FULL TRUTH.
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
Matthew 6:33 – 34
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